Just Back The Armored Truck into my Garage to Unload the Money ;)

Here's a fun exercise.  Do you know your limitations to receiving?  If we pretend we have won the lottery, we can all say "Thank you so much!!  Just back the armored car up into my garage and I'll have it unloaded lickety split".  Ok that's an easy one, because the money is not from a personal source.

Most of us, though, do limit our abilities to receive.  If someone says, "here take this, it's a gift" our feelings about receiving are based on several variables: can the giver afford it; are we keeping score; what does it say about me to accept it; is it too much?  It's kind of like a Jenga puzzle or the game Clue.  If Oprah is in her studio offering me a new car and everyone else accepted one we are not keeping score. If she thinks I deserve it then heck, yeah, where are my keys?

If my neighbor offers to walk my child to school every day because she is going anyway, but I don't have younger kids at home, I  may feel the need to reciprocate.  Why, if we are grateful, should we feel guilty about receiving?  When we are truly doing what we want to do, giving what we want to give, sharing what we want to share and being who we want to be, there isn't any hidden score-keeping or resentment.  Many of us don't live our lives that way, though.

When we take action based on guilt instead of based on truly wanting to do something with no strings attached, we may be outwardly helping but inwardly hindering our abilities to be our best.  Heartfelt gifts should have no strings attached.  Repayment is unnecessary.  Underneath that, though, is the cognitive dissonance where there is only so much resistance we can tolerate when it's a personal relationship.  That's human nature.

Receiving is a skill that can be developed.  When we are able to receive more, we are more likely to be tolerant of other people's actions, also.  It sounds disconnected, but people who can't receive need life to be fair.  When we think others are getting more than they should, we have less tolerance for them.  "Yeah, that is sad news but at least that family has............."  Charities need to use a personal story, we want to help the people who are down on their luck.  

Wouldn't the world be a better place if we could all be more tolerant and giving, without going through the thought process of whether or not someone is deserving?  Not giving until it hurts, but sharing whatever we have in surplus.  We are all deserving and we all have more to share than we realize.  A friend of mine shares her dessert with me when she bakes for her family.  It's the best feeling in the world to be the recipient of unexpected baked goods!!  

What do you have to share and what have you been pushing away that people want to give you?  Most of us have an overabundance of something (time, clothes, or we made too much lasagna).  The more we are able to receive, the more we have and want to share.  

Have a great day!

Xo

Conni

(edited and republished)