Hello Beautiful:)

 If your first reaction was to look over your shoulder to see who I was speaking to, or to think, "who, me.......not in this lifetime, honey, have you seen my thighs??"......there is something you need to work on internally.

We are ALL innately beautiful, inside and out!!  Our feelings about ourselves reflect to the outside world, meaning if you don't think you are beautiful, it's harder for anyone else to think that about you.  You know how predators can sense weakness in their prey, right?  It's the same idea here.  Others can feel what you feel about yourself, some feel more than others, though.

If you have access to a computer and/or an office supply store, we are in business.  Labels would be best, but if not, use computer paper and scotch tape to print out as many labels as possible saying "Hello Beautiful!!!"  Next, tape them to your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your desk, your washer and dryer; pin them to your bulletin board and on your pintrest wall.  We can get creative, too........buy some magnet strips if you have fancy, schmancy appliances and you don't want to use scotch tape.

Building strength of knowing that you are beautiful is a skill.  Skills becomes stronger with dedication and practice.  There are underlying factors that can make you unable to fully strengthen the knowingness that you are beautiful.  If you have been in an abusive situation or have trauma and shame in your past, there is more work to do.  No worries, though, there is hope for each and every one of us!!

Do you feel you dress your truth?  I have started buying brighter colors for myself.  Some people look great in black, I am not one of them.  When you receive a compliment, take note of what you are wearing and buy it in multiples;)

Yes, we are who we are and if being true to yourself is dressing down every day, more power to you!!  But if you are dressing down because you feel like you are too old, fat, ugly, or you are having a bad year or decade, rethink that habit, k?   YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL it brings tears to my eyes.  I'm serious, I literally have tears in my eyes!!  If you can't make these changes without assistance, please find someone to help you.

Have a wonderful day!
xo
Conni

Today's Mantra:  I am beautiful!

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

When Was the Last Time You Felt Magic in Your Life?

We went to a birthday celebration and it was magical!!  Can you guess why?  Nope, not because of the presents or the entertainment or the food.  Although the food was amazing and the entertainment made a few of us cry with joy, the magic happened because of why we were there.

My husband's aunt turned 90 and she is in great health, physically and mentally.  There were guests from around the country and she even had some international guests.  (Canada counts as international, right?)  Of course, there were incredible invitations and photo albums that told stories, beautiful flowers, cakes to die for, a bit of dancing, music and toasts to the guest of honor.  But there was an alchemy that happened because no one was there for the food, dessert or entertainment, we were there for her.  She appreciated it and we knew how much she appreciated it and we appreciated that she appreciated it.

It's really exciting to be part of something bigger than yourself.  We looked forward to it months in advance and we will cherish the memories of it forever.  There was no way we weren't going to be a part of it. Attendance was "a given" for us so we made it happen.  Frequent flyer miles and hotel points were used with smiles on our faces:)  We lucked out because the kids had off school.

The definition of alchemy, "a seemingly magical power", brings an outcome greater that the sum of its parts.  It's not ever about striving for perfection, there were a few mishaps included in our gathering.  It's more about letting go of the need for perfection to find tremendous joy and happiness in the midst of the imperfection of life.

I would guess that some of the guests didn't feel it, not everyone takes the time to notice it.  It might come later in the retelling of an emotional moment, or the heartfelt details noticed in looking at the pictures.  It might not come to everyone.  If you have a moment of alchemy, try to cherish it.  We are all pieces of a larger puzzle, but sometimes we have an understanding of knowing some moments are more magical than others.  It happens as pieces fit together with perfect harmony.

Have a great day!!

Xo

Conni 

Today's Mantra:  I intend to notice magical moments in my life.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

Angels and Devils

We all make good and bad choices every day.  If we are too hard on ourselves, it causes negative effects over a period of time in our bodies.  When we are too easy on ourselves and never push boundaries, we won't learn and grow.  If others are too hard on us and use shame to make lessons hurt, our bodies remember that shame when we have similar experiences in the future.

The angel in us wants to make a perfect choice, the devil wants us to break the rules. There is a part of us that wants to do our best and a part of us that really (really) doesn't.  Each of us has different reasons why we stop ourselves from making good choices.  Asking ourselves "why" is the beginning of that awareness.

This morning (Saturday) I woke up and wanted to go to yoga.  Another part of me wanted to have a couple extra cups of coffee and hang around and not have to do anything that would take me away from my place of peace and happiness in my home.  No matter what my decision, I choose to release any guilt or judgment about it.  I choose to be OK with my choice.  That is the first step:  self-acceptance.

I still don't know which part of me is gonna win. And if I am going to yoga, I need to start chugging water so I can rehydrate myself after my coffee.  It takes effort and commitment to follow the angel's advice and move forward to a path that will be healthier than staying at home drinking a few extra cups of coffee without hydrating.  But the bigger lesson is self-acceptance, I will love and accept myself no matter what I do.

In the short term what matters is which decision will give you relief.  Take action and see how it feels......I just shut off the coffee maker and had a glass of water.  I put on my workout clothes and listen to my self-talk.

If I feel resistance, I note "why" and if I don't, I take the next step forward.  I had more resistance to going when I only had a few sets of yoga clothes, leading to the need to do laundry more often; so I bought more yoga clothes.  I had resistance because I had scheduling conflicts so I asked for help with those from my husband.  He assisted with carpools when needed.  If you aren't asking for help in reaching your long-term goals, take note of that.  Resistance is based on internal struggles.  Part of our minds want us to pick the path of least resistance.  That is why it's better to make changes one step at a time and really take the time to understand what is stopping us from moving forward.   

There is always another breath, another day to regroup and make different choices.  When we find a safe place to spread our wings, it's easier to learn how to fly.  One reason I love my yoga class is because the instructors always affirm that my best is good enough.  One day, another participant said she might stay in "child's pose" (the resting pose) the entire class because she was physically and mentally wiped.  The instructor said "no problem - listening to your body is important".  Once we decide to make positive changes in our lives, we will face challenges and resistance.  It's nice to be surrounded by supportive people when it happens.

Have a great day!

Xo

Conni

Today's Mantra:  I will move forward towards my goals and will love myself no matter what.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

"Mommas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys"

Are you invested in people's actions, other than your dependent children's?  It could be that you are worried that your friends/extended family/bartender will make the same mistakes you did and you are trying to save them some money/time/effort.  Of course, awareness is important, so sharing information with people you care about can be extremely helpful.  But many of us learn through experience and other people's advice comes with their personal experiences as a filter, which could be good or bad.

I believe that kids who have a strong sense of belonging, who are taught it's OK to make mistakes and learn from them and who are shown unconditional love from an early age are in better positions to make good choices in high school and beyond.  We all make mistakes and need to be held accountable for them.  Are you OK with your kids skipping advanced education to work on a dude ranch?  It's not good or bad to tell your kids they must go to college; having the background to own his or her dude ranch in the future will be easier after some business classes.

"Mommas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys

Don't let 'em pick guitars and drive them old trucks

Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such"

Are "doctors and lawyers and such" happier?  I'm not sure that is true.  And by the way, cowboys are awesome!!  Let's do our best to have an awareness of when and why we are invested in other people's decisions, if they are not our children.  I "tip my hat" to the cowboys of the world; the people with the freedom to ride the range, wear cool boots and make their livings working outdoors;)

Have a great day!!

xo
Conni


Today's Mantra:  I intend to have an awareness of being invested in other people's decisions.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

"We All Need Somebody to Lean On"

Are you a rock?  If your identity is emotionally attached to being the strong one, can you take a step back to make sure you are being taken care of? "We all need somebody to lean on."

It's awesome to know people count on us.  Do you have someone you can count on?  A friend mentioned her husband saves a special brand of soda for her that other family members aren't aware of, that's cool.  Do you have someone who brings you coffee in bed on the weekends?  If someone does that for you every day, he or she is a "keeper"!!  

Most people are over-committed during the week, can you allow yourself to be taken care of during your downtime?  If you don't have someone to bring you coffee, maybe pay for a massage or find someone, paid or unpaid, to listen to you for a while.  With meet-up and other support groups, there are many opportunities to share.

Those who don't have that person, paid or unpaid, may fall into unhealthy patterns to release stress.  My goal is that we have a gentle awareness or what we do and why we do it, not a "brick over the head" just a light and gentle thought of why we make choices.

Life is supposed to be FUN!!  We are supposed to enjoy our human experience!!  If you feel unsupported, try to find healthy ways to support yourself.  Please make sure you schedule time for yourself.

Have a great day!!

xo
Conni

Today's Mantra:  I intend to balance taking care of others and taking care of myself.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

Are You Allowing Yourself to Shine?

Do you believe you are showing the world your true potential?  Some of us may be hiding without even realizing it.  Having an awareness of our words, body language and how we present ourselves to the world will allow us to evaluate ourselves.  If you are happy with your efforts and you are living without regrets, it's all good.  If you feel you have more to give than you are giving, then perhaps you can take time soon to begin to figure out what is stopping you.

We are all special and we all deserve to show our best to the world.  It starts internally.  Do you believe you are special?  We all have gifts and talents to share and we should be proud of becoming competent at those gifts and talents.  If you don't believe you have mastered your talents, no worries.  That's just an indication to start small.  Perhaps sing in the subways before walking onstage in Carnegie Hall.

Reaching for the stars without having the safety net of honing our skills with practice and dedication can cause pain, so be careful out there.  I am a member of the "Epic Fail" club, myself.......I decided to own it.  If you are a fellow member, just hop back up, dust yourself off, and begin again.  We are not limited to a certain number of turns in life.

Here is what to consider:

1. Knowing we have our own gifts and talents.
2. Knowing we deserve the best life has to offer us.
3. Knowing the more we love ourselves, the more we are open to new possibilities.
4. Practicing and mastering our personal gifts and talents.
5. Sharing our gifts and talents with the world.

If you know you are hiding, and you can't understand the reasons why, there are many techniques to go deeper to work through these complicated issues.  If there was trauma involved, please work with a professional to process these issues.  

When you are ready to shine, you will be able to share your gifts and talents with a greater audience, which benefits everyone.  Please take note of the areas in your life where you may be holding yourself back.  We need you at your best to help us all learn and grow.

Have a wonderful day!!

xo

Conni


Today's Mantra:  I will look internally to see if I am holding myself back.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

"Set It and Forget It"

If you don't enjoy Ron Popeil, you must not know enough about him.  He is an amazing entrepreneur, a brilliant marketer, and compels me to (almost) buy everything he sells.

With our worries, we need to take the same approach that he has with his rotisserie chicken, "set it and forget it".  Constant worry about a situation helps nothing.  It's actually detrimental.  

Worried about retirement?  Meet with a trusted independent fiduciary advisor.  In addition, set up a plan to automatically add as much as you can to the principal of your mortgage (if you have one), or add an additional amount to your 401K, and let it go.  I set up a small extra weekly payment to go to my mortgage.  It's not enough to hurt, and it's effortless.  Note:  when you make a contribution beyond what is necessary, you will feel better about it, it's a mind "hack".   When you start to agonize about your debt, your mind will remember your extra efforts which leads to mental relief.
                                               

Want a healthier body?  Increase consumption of fresh vegetables or an organic veggie powder that you can add to a smoothie; schedule and commit to exercise; and let your body recreate itself over time.  I set up an automatic shipment of my organic (chocolate) veggie powder so I don't have to worry about running to the store to stay healthy.  I just began adding a tablespoon of organic whole husk psyllium, too.  Yes, there are methods that lead to faster results, but I decided to focus on my long-term health instead of eliminating foods I love.  I'm a foodie:)

Worried about not spending enough time with your kids?  Schedule mandatory family dinners and keep it light.  It's easy to add recurring appointments to our family calendars.  The beginning is about bonding and unconditional love; the heavier stuff has to come after bonding unless deans or law enforcement are involved.....

What if we all collectively decided to take action, release our worries, and be proud of how far we have come, without dwelling on the bad things that have occurred?  It's all about keeping our focus on the silver linings, baby!!  

"But wait, there's more!!"  We all can make our lives easier than they currently are.  Why don't you?  It takes effort in the beginning, yes; but the ripple effect of these changes are worth it.  That is what taking control of our lives is all about!

Have a wonderful day!!

xo
Conni

Today's Mantra:  I will re-evaluate my life to see if there are items I can "set and forget".

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

Freedom Sounds Out of Reach But Is It?

When I think of breaking away, my imagination goes to packing up my car, wrapping a scarf around my neck, adding cool shades, putting the top down on my Mercedes-Benz convertible and driving away from my responsibilities with a wave and a smile.  Wait!!!  I don't have a Mercedes-Benz convertible, it's cold here and I wouldn't leave my family to drive off into the sunset.

Why do we think freedom is all or nothing?  Sometimes, we can become so comfortable with what defines us that we can't wrap our minds around understanding we can change one step at a time.  Instead of hating the daily grind of cooking dinners, we can buy semi-prepared foods or make weekend cooking co-ops with our peeps an enjoyable activity.  Instead of complaining about the cost of organic food, we can find a food co-op or grow our own vegetables.  Freedom is about spending as much time as possible doing what we love to do.

Have you re-evaluated how you spend your time?  What do you want to change in your life?  Changes aren't impossible when we take them step-by-step.  The reasons we don't release ourselves from unwanted circumstances are varied, but is it possible we are worried we won't live up to our self-imposed standards of what it takes to be a good parent/employee/friend/neighbor/citizen?

The important question to ask yourself is "why".  In many cases, there are easier ways to do things.  Why are we choosing to do it the hard way?  "It builds character":  ummmm I think we all have enough; "I've always done it a different way":  can you be open to change, even a little?  "What if 'they' judge me?":  if they are judgmental, they will judge you anyway.  Ask yourself "why" you are resisting changes and start writing down the answers.  Patterns will emerge, I promise.

It's never all or nothing.  Unless we are in a crisis or an unsafe situation, there is no reason for ultimatums and breaking away.  Freedom doesn't have to be a dream or something that we can only hope to have in retirement.  I've seen too many people die before their time, our time is now!!

Who do you want to be?  What do you want to change?  More freedom is possible, because many of our barriers are self-imposed.  What if this weekend, you decided to take a small break from responsibilities that you believe are set in stone but truly are not?  The answers are inside of us, the reasons "why" we are creating our own barriers are malleable.  What we believe is not set in stone.  Our lives can become happier and easier, step-by-step.

Have a great day!

Xo

Conni

Today's Mantra:  I choose to reconsider activities that are optional and I don't enjoy.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.

Process the Bad And Hold On To the Good

Do you have friends or acquaintances that perhaps have a hard time letting go of the bad things that have happened to them, to someone they know or to someone they have heard about in the news?  Sometimes, these people may be referred to as "Debbie Downers"  which may be harsh.  I don't believe they bring others down on purpose.  I believe they think they are doing an act of service to the rest of us, reminding us to be careful out there, because life is hard.

Yes, we all are safer with a community watch, reminders of who to be on the lookout for, forwarded emails and Facebook posts about what's going on in our 'hoods, but the important distinction is how much we dwell on the bad. Some of us become addicted to bad news.  

We all have good and we all have bad.  We must process the bad to be done with it.  Keep the lesson, but release the belief that if there is a potential for something bad to happen, it will happen to you.  If we don't process trauma and fear, we are setting ourselves up for further bad down the line.  Holding onto stress can have a negative effect either in body and/or in mind.  The bad must be acknowledged, processed and released to move forward, and then it can be a memory without pain attached.

Those steps must be taken to live our fullest and most productive lives.  Individuals who don't take those steps feel like it's their jobs to remind the rest of us of the bad, sometimes often.  So here's the deal, no need to be harsh, no need to be rude.  We acknowledge the gift they give us as an opportunity to gage whether or not our personal processing has been done on each issue.  We thank them and move on without re-engaging with the negative energy of unnecessary fear.

I used to believe every time someone reminded me of a bad possibility, it was an indication I was not taking appropriate action to keep myself safe in our big, bad world.  But every time I made myself safer, I shut myself off from possibilities that could have been mine.  Now, I do my best either taking action or deciding it's not necessary, and move on without re-engaging.  We don't have to protect ourselves from every random negative act that could happen.  

Checking our locks on our doors, using our seat belts and eating our vegetables are wonderful habits.  Have an awareness of anyone in your life who has a pattern of making you feel unsafe.  We need to be open and receptive to our personal possibilities in order to live our best lives.

Have a great day!

xo

Conni

Today's Mantra:  I choose to take action to keep myself safe and release the fears that are keeping me from my best life.

Mantra for Every Day: I choose to send love to all; receiving love back multiplied in infinite proportions, creating and nurturing pathways of love.