The Presumptuousness of Joy

The world is an interesting place.  With a 24-hour news cycle, we can learn about terrible events as often as we desire.  It makes some people feel more in control to have all the facts imaginable at their "beck and call".  However, focusing on the negative truly takes away from the time we have to focus on the positive.

Merriam-Webster defines presumptuous as:  "overstepping due bounds (as of propriety or courtesy) :  taking liberties".  In my opinion, we all should strive to be presumptuous about our personal joy.  I believe it's our duty to be joyful, because joy is the basis of powerful, life-affirming creations.

The paradigm shift is that we are not taking away from anyone else by being joyful.  We must find joy in the present moment and choose to create joyful experiences to lead our best lives.  I am at my best when I am near a large body of water.  If that is impossible in my current circumstances, I can imagine it or find it via media outlets to begin the creation of joy when I am upset.  Then, I add my fav music and dance :)

What brings you joy?  It is important to have an awareness that unfulfilled wishes and dreams can change us if we don't process the sadness.  Disappointment can stifle our hopefulness for a better future.  Doesn't it make sense that to covet and purposefully seek out joy is part of the answer to a better future?

When the fear of lack and evil overtakes the pursuit of joy and happiness, we need to regroup.  In a perfect world, shouldn't creativity be rewarded?  Do you believe a $5 baseball bat can bring a player the same joy as a $500 baseball bat?  What about a keyboard vs a piano or a dollar store tiara vs the Queen's tiara?  Our brains allow us to imagine our inexpensive props are the real deal.

Perhaps once we treasure ourselves on the inside, we care less about showing others we treasure ourselves through our possessions.  Life is supposed to be fun and joyful and hopeful.  Yes, we need to keep up with current events, but we don't need to obsess about them.  We have "people" to do that for us. 

Yes, we need to protect ourselves, but after we take action, holding onto the fear and worry of what could happen sucks the joy out of the present moment.  Building a foundation of knowing we can all find happiness in our lives is one of the keys to reaching our highest, best possibilities and potential.  We all deserve that, but we have to understand it first.

Have a great day!

Xo

Conni

What Holistic Means to Me

I was recently asked my definition of "holistic".  I had not given the answer the respect it deserved at the time I was asked the question.  To me, being holistic begins with working on our personal wholeness as a priority.  Each of us in the holistic community strives to become whole as a person, while in some way making the world a better place.  

Living authentically with congruence between our work and personal lives allows us to move toward wholeness as a person.  Being authentic, to me, is about embracing the truth of how our gifts and talents can best serve the world.  Having an awareness of when our egos come into play creates an atmosphere of knowing that we have opportunities to heal ourselves.

We were all conceived in wholeness.  Those of us who choose to have purposeful intentions of moving toward wholeness again know that we can do so.  Processing deep and painful negative emotions is not for the faint-hearted.  You must trust the person you choose to work with as you are guided to heal.

We can be vulnerable when we choose to surround ourselves with those who allow themselves to be vulnerable in their own journeys of personal growth.  It's important to have a level of trust as we work on our deepest issues.  It's not that we are looking for perfection, rather that we search for other people who try their best to have pure intentions.

I believe we all have access to Universal Wholeness.  I also believe that Universal Wholeness is available to us at all times.  "Ask and Receive", to me, is about knowing we are worthy and deserving of connecting a power greater than ourselves.  Of course, we all need to be accountable, ask forgiveness and make amends for our mistakes.  

No one is perfect.  We all make mistakes, and our best is based on where we are in the moment of time we are taking action.  As we learn and grow, striving toward personal wholeness while connecting to Universal Wholeness allows us to resonate with our highest possibilities.  That is a life worth living!

Have a great day!

xo

Conni

Real Issues Teach Us Where We Resist and React

I recently had a conversation with someone about a "hot-button" issue.  I didn't even realize it was a hot-button to me until the other person pointed it out.  And....it surprised me because I have been working on my own emotional memories for a while now.

So, I was in the moment, explaining my position, and I realized I must have had a similar experience with negative emotions attached to the issue.  If that ever happens to you, it's time to take a step back and find a way to process your hidden emotional trauma because it will come again until it is neutralized or reduced.  Some people can do the processing themselves, other people need a friend, a practitioner or a health care professional to assist them.

When I got off the phone, I sat down and thought "where in my life did I have a similar experience regarding this issue that ended badly for me?".  Then, a memory came up and I emotionally worked through it.  Now, the next time a similar issue comes up, I will react less or not react at all.

When we become aware of when we react, we know our egos are involved.  Our egos are trying to defend us and keep us safe.  I was defending myself when I reacted harshly to the topic involved.  My emotional processing took my emotive response down several notches.

It can be painful to revisit past events, but the memories are already in you with negative energy attached to them.  Emotional healing helps our bodies feel better.  We reduce the stress of holding unpleasant memories inside of us.

Have a great day!

xo
Conni

Finding Your Zen: Are You Having Fun Yet?

The belief that we can change the effect a negative memory, to allow more fun now, is powerful and exciting.  My first impression of "zen" is thinking about (hungry) monks meditating on mountaintops.  Hey, whatever floats your boat but that is not for me.  When I used to imagine hypnosis, I thought about someone humiliating me onstage if I volunteered to be a participant:  not for me, either.

The truth is, becoming more conscious of how I can control my reactions to situations has made me happier, more joyful, more productive: all without using illegal drugs ;)  It is fun to wake up each morning knowing I have access to peace through meditation.  I have become happier inside and out.

If you have had abuse or trauma in your past, you may have misunderstood an oversimplified version of mindfulness and being "in the moment".  It doesn't mean we forget what has happened in the past; nor do we leave ourselves unprotected from bad people, places or things.

It does mean we get to a place within ourselves to ACCEPT the fact that events which happened in the past cannot be changed by holding onto feelings of anger, resentfulness or bitterness.  Those feelings block our happiness in the moment of NOW.

Acceptance does not mean we allow ourselves to be hurt again, nor does it mean we let our abusers "off the hook" of being accountable.  However, we do need to process and release the pain of reliving bad memories over and over again; as we find ways to keep ourselves safe from further abuse.  Then, we can regroup and find more authentic happiness.

Have a great day!

xo
Conni

The Basics of Abundance: Power, Possibilities and Potential

"Let's start at the very beginning"....no, that's for singing, not abundance ;)  If you have not yet found your zone, your flow, your zen; you are on the zigzag path instead of the shortcut.  I invite you to find your personal power.

Do you know someone who has power as an extension of someone else?  Maybe it's someone's entourage, a groupie or any person whose existence is the reflection of someone else's glory?  Internally, that is a long road to nowhere.  We deserve to be the stars of our own lives, not an extension of someone else's life.  Starring in our own shows is imperative to authentic happiness.

I am many things:  a wife, a mom, a sister, a friend, a blogger, an energy practitioner.  But the true "I am" is the essence of me, not the reflection of who I am in relation to someone else.  If you don't know what makes you special and unique, now is the time to figure it out.  Being special, unique and "enough" is in the core of our beings, it has been with us since we were born.  If someone told you differently, they were just plain wrong.

You are enough.  You are special, unique and the world is better because you are here.  The path to personal greatness begins with believing you are great.  Any person's negative voice in your ear must be tuned out.  We can lessen the power of other people's negative influences with meditation, hypnosis, energy modalities and by having an awareness that you do not have to accept unkind words.

We all deserve the best life has to offer us.  We are worthy and deserving of living our lives using our best gifts and talents, which are unique to us.  If you don't feel that way, today is the day to begin your new journey to your personal best!

Have a great day!

xo
Conni

Asking for Help......Can we only ask when we need it?

......and are we needy if we ask for help?  One of the biggest and most confusing obstacles in my path was the belief that we can only ask for help when we really, truly, desperately need it.  Asking for assistance when we are not needy and desperate is a necessity to living our best lives.  Do you hesitate before asking for help?

It always starts with being authentic.  If we set the intention to ask for help in an authentic and honest way, it sets up the path to success.  You know, stop "crying wolf".  Don't ask for money to pay the rent and then head to Vegas with the money (did anyone else enjoy that "Everybody Loves Raymond" episode??).

When we request assistance, it is important to know the system involves "give and take".  We are not always asking and we are not always giving.  Give what you have an abundance of, take what you lack.  I love to share my gifts and talents when possible.  I will ask for assistance with other things I lack.

The paradigm shift of believing we are not taking away from other people when we ask for something for ourselves is imperative to grasping the abundance strategy.  But when some people make requests, they feel like it is wrong because of starving children in other parts of the world.  Truth be told, we can assist them more when we have more to give them.  So.....asking for ourselves while living authentically creates possibilities of having more to give.

The position of our mental mindset will change the result of what we receive in response to a request.  Knowing we are enough and having a bad moment is different than desperation.  It feels different and intuitive people can feel that energy.  A hiring manager probably would not want to give a job to someone who looks and feels hopeless.  

So what does one do if he or she is hopeless?  We have to believe in a better tomorrow, surround ourselves with nature and other no-cost abundance and concentrate on the knowingness that tomorrow can be a clean slate.  If you did not have a good support system as a child, you need to find one now.  Gathering the strength to know you need help is a hopeful sign!  We all can lead better lives, one step at a time.

Have a great day!

xo
Conni

When Wishing Isn't Enough...

We all have self-imposed limits.  What I believe I can't do and why I believe I can't do it are personal restrictions.  This is how we are standing in our own way.

We can learn how to get out of our own way.  It's a skill that can be taught.  It's painless and easy, it just takes time.  It begins with awareness of what we say to others and what we say to ourselves.  Any time you catch yourself saying "I can't because......", that is a self-imposed limit.  I'm not talking about changing your past, I am talking about limits involving why we can't live up to our own personal potential in this moment.

Here's an example.  In my childhood, I was told (often) I wasn't athletic.  Actually, I was a pretty good sprinter.  I believed outside sources and used it to stop myself from being at my highest potential of physical performance.  I chose not to try out for high school sports because I believed I wasn't athletic and I further believed everyone else who tried out for sports was athletic.  I have since realized that was a self-imposed limit.  I can change that belief to break through to new possibilities.

Part of success is knowing how to dream and wish for more than what we have currently, another part is the mental shift, then we use effort to move forward on our path, one step at a time.  It is all mind-body.  Using physical effort without mental change is so last year ;)

Changing mental beliefs along with effort is the shortcut to success.  It is so much faster than only using effort, hard-work and breaking through brick walls.  Finding and reducing self-imposed limits is like using heavy machinery to break through the brick walls.  Another option is walking around the brick wall.  If you believe life has to be hard, that is a limiting belief.  Changing that makes everything easier!

xo
Conni